{august 12, 2009}

~wednesday~


I can say without a doubt that I have experienced things in the last few years that have made it very clear how Heavenly Father can take my burdens. I have to admit however that when I'm feeling so confused and lost and like I want to run away and hide in cave, it's hard for me to REMEMBER to lay my burdens at His feet. Well last night as I finished the day feeling all those negative feelings, I remembered! I didn't know what else to do but turn it over to Him, and have faith that He would take care of it. So let me tell you about today. I didn't wake up feeling peaceful and have this amazing answer pop into my head that solved all my problems. No...I still woke up feeling lost and frustrated. I had to pray constantly today just to keep calm. I wanted to take action. I wanted to DO something that would fix it. (I wish eating this Dilly Bar would have been the fix, but alas, it was not. It tasted great, but the problem still existed.) I was having a hard time being patient. I wanted the answer or the fix now. I like to control my life, so this was extremely vexing for me. Well, as the day unfolded small little things happened that finally resulted in a culminating experience that had me sitting in awe and peace as the day came to an end. It wasn't an easy ride. I wish I didn't have to have days like this, and yet I have to say I'm grateful. Grateful for His love for me and His patience. I'm grateful for friends that play their part in bringing the plan together. I'm grateful for those who were inspired to call me and inspired in what they said. I wish I could remember this experience every day, but I know I won't. Isn't this why we have to go through things over and over. We need the practice to become closer to perfect. I am being perfected every day. I know I'll never be perfect, but that's why the Savior's gift is so important.

~ Be still, and know that I am God. ~
Psalms 46:10